Mom Thoughts

Camden’s Birth Story

I have debated when to recount the day of (and day before) Camden’s birth. Mostly due to wanting to spend time going through each detail so the memories wouldn’t fade as mom brain creeps in even more.

I honestly could not have asked for a better experience. I am still beyond pleased with how everything played out leading up to Camden’s birth. I was nervous as I approached 40 weeks and knowing my doctor would be scheduling me for an induction if he didn’t show up soon.

We were scheduled to check into the hospital on July 20th at 9:30pm. I was already anxious and then slightly annoyed because it’s well known my bedtime is 8pm. The hospital was an hour away so we had quite an evening ahead of us. I was told I could eat up until I walk into the hospital so I chose to eat a hamburger (something I had craved my entire pregnancy) and watch the Twilight saga while waiting for it to be time to leave.

Last picture before going to the hospital.

Our hospital bag had been packed for a few weeks, just in case. But Camden was comfy and in no hurry to leave my belly. We even had ultrasound images of him frowning to prove it. “Leave me alone, mom and dad!”

The entire drive to the hospital I felt nauseous from nerves. It was happening. We were going to meet our baby within the next 24 hours, God willing. This would be my first time checked into a hospital for myself which added to my nervousness. I wasn’t sure what to expect no matter how many books and articles I read on labor and delivery in a hospital.

Once we got there they separated me and Kaleb which is apparently standard procedure. They checked with me that I was okay having him in the room with me. The 30 minutes we were apart felt like hours. I’ve been with my husband for almost 10 years. The past 2 years we have been nearly inseparable due to current world events. All I wanted was for him to re-enter the room and tell me it was going to be okay. Thankfully as we got closer to 10:30pm, he walked in.

First, I got to put on the super stylish labor gown, get an IV put in, and 2 bands around my belly to track baby’s heart beat and my contractions. It was news to me that I had been contracting the entire time leading up to our arrival. After answering a ton of questions about my pregnancy and handing off my birth wish list, they started me on pill 1 out of 3 to get labor going. I can’t remember what it was called but I was also so exhausted already and dying to go to sleep. (Jokes on me for thinking I would get any rest!)

Of course, as pregnant women do, I needed to pee before going to sleep. This may seem like a silly part of the story but I need to shout out my husband for this. I was attached to an IV. I couldn’t just get up. It was already hard to get up without being attached to something! This man walked me to the bathroom so many times, helping me remove the belly bands, unplugging the IV, walking me over, physically lifting me off the toilet all while rocking the extremely flattering hospital gown. He did it without a second thought. I knew my husband loved me but his love shined through in an entirely new way while going through labor.

Sometime in the early morning they checked my cervix and surprise! I had not dilated at all. Nothing. 0. They gave me the 2nd pill in the series of 3 and let me go back to sleep. Not long after that is when the pain started kicking in. I was contracting like crazy. Kaleb was able to see my contractions on the screen thanks to one of the belly monitors so he could understand why I was tensing and trying to breathe. No worries. I can make it through this. They checked me again to discover I was still not dilating. Then came my worst nightmare, the Foley balloon.

My nurses were awesome. My day nurse kept reminding me I could get the epidural whenever I wanted. I declined because the pain was tolerable. I was okay. I could do this. I had nothing against getting the epidural, I was anticipating getting it at some point but wasn’t sure when exactly. The Foley balloon was uncomfortable when it was placed but nothing beats the pain that came soon after.

I was contracting even more. It felt insane. The minutes felt like literal hours. I was shocked to find out it was only 9:30am when my mom arrived. The day had only begun?! All I remember was moaning in pain and trying to breathe. That was when my nurse said she was calling in the anesthesiologist to begin my epidural. I don’t think I answered. I think I just moaned.

My husband held my hand the entire time until he needed to step aside for the nurses to get in. My mom set up my stroller fan (can’t recommend packing that one enough!) cause I was sweating like crazy. Two of my nurses were in nursing school and this was their first day in the OB rotation. They were so fun and kept things light while I endured the pain. They physically lifted and held me in place while the epidural was inserted in my spine. I can still remember leaning forward and feeling like I couldn’t do it anymore. I was in so much pain and we were hardly progressing. The threat of Pitocin was looming. If we had to do it, I would do it but I was really hoping I wouldn’t have to.

It didn’t take long for the epidural to kick in. To this day, I joke about how the epidural is my favorite drug. I was relaxing finally. I could no longer feel my waist down. My legs felt like they were 10,000 lbs. It was awesome. My nurses had to flip me from side to side like a roasted turkey which was the funniest thing to me.

By the afternoon, my nurse removed the Foley balloon to discover my water had broken on its own. Hallelujah! A manual water breaking was another thing that there were whispers of and thank God, that was no longer on the agenda. I had dilated to a 5. We were on our way. By 2pm, I had dilated to an 8. We were definitely having a baby today!

At some point before then, another nurse came in and said she was excited to hear we would be having the baby today and not tomorrow like anticipated. Excuse me?! Who said we were having this baby on Thursday?! If I had heard that earlier I would’ve lost it. I was ready to meet my baby, today.

One of my hopes for delivery was to have my makeup done. I know this isn’t for everyone but I appreciate that I had the opportunity to do my makeup. I packed my makeup, lashes, and makeup mirror so I would be prepared. My mother graciously helped me apply everything and held my mirror over my face so I could apply my lashes. I was bound to my hospital bed so there was only so much I could do on my own. Once my makeup was done, I felt ready. It still hadn’t fully sunk in that I would be meeting my son within the next few hours.

Around 4:30pm, it was go time. My doctor had been called and my nurses had me start pushing while the nursing students physically held my legs. Delivering my baby left me feeling the most vulnerable I’ve ever felt but at the same time I felt supported by every single person in that room.

We spent a few minutes pushing and then the nurse had me stop to wait for my doctor. She said I could push one more time if I felt it was necessary because it would be a while longer. Surprise! She had me stop immediately because he was coming faster than anticipated.

Not long after my doctor arrived, Camden’s head was visible. I told Kaleb I didn’t care if he wanted to stay up by my head or peek when baby was entering the world. This man has quite literally seen all sides of me. There was no worry of embarrassment, more so an unsure feeling of how else my body could appear after watching it grow the past 9 months.

I was so focused on breathing and pushing that I didn’t notice my sweet husband looking down. “Babe, he has hair!” He said and repeated over and over with a huge smile on his face. “Babe, I can see his hair!” I couldn’t believe how overjoyed my husband already was about just seeing 2 inches of our baby’s scalp.

My doctor asked if I wanted a mirror. Previously, I thought “mmm, better not.” But between my mom and Kaleb’s convincing, they pulled one around. Another view of myself that I never anticipated seeing in my life. There was a head. A big ole’ head. And wow, my thighs looked odd at this angle. These were literally my thoughts as I continued to push and glance at the mirror.

Delivering for the first time was not what I expected. There was a lot more waiting around than what the movies make it seem like. Nothing was rushed. It was a calmer atmosphere. (I’m sure most of that is thanks to my good pal, the epidural!) Even while spending that time, holding my legs, crunching my body, holding my breath and bearing down, it wasn’t hitting me how soon we would be holding our son.

I had mentally prepared for an episiotomy. I had it spelled out in my birth wish list that I would prefer it over tearing after hours of research. My doctor turned the mirror away while explaining what she was about to do and what it would feel like even though I was mostly numb. Once she began cutting it just felt like added pressure.

Honestly, the most painful part was the veins in my head that I swore were gonna pop from holding my breath. I did make mention of my excitement to get Botox after all of this was said and done. My doctor paused, looked up and said matter of factly, “Not until you’re done breastfeeding.” The comedic timing couldn’t have been better.

Minutes later, it felt like my belly was being vacuumed out. I could feel my stomach drop dramatically and watched my baby being lifted up into the air. My baby. My son. My Camden.

I am so grateful for the nurses who took so many pictures of me, my husband, and my mom as Camden entered the world. Nothing else mattered in those moments and you can see it through the pictures. Memories fade but those photos are reminders of what we felt that day.

I remember feeling euphoric as he laid on my chest. Kaleb cut the cord, which I also have documented so well by my mom. He was giddy over it.

Pre-baby I wasn’t sure how I’d feel about him being laid on my chest covered in the fun fluids he was swimming in for months. It didn’t matter. It didn’t phase me at all. In fact, it was nothing compared to the amount of pee, poop, and spit up I’ve been covered in the months since.

I didn’t notice until later how many nurses were standing in the room. Apparently Camden was the first baby born that day at 5:06pm. Everyone was crying. It was the most amazing environment I could’ve ever asked for to welcome my baby to the world.

A few hours had passed, we had spent time doing skin to skin, breastfeeding, and taking in who we thought our son would look like. I handed Camden off to Kaleb while the nurses helped me to the bathroom to get cleaned up. My advice? Don’t look back. Don’t look at the bed you just gave birth in. I was astonished at the amount of blood. Listen, it makes sense. But I was not prepared. The nurses kept assuring me this was normal and it was okay. I was mortified and vulnerable once again as they helped me onto the toilet and cleaned me up. To that I have to say: Nurses are underpaid and under appreciated.

Quickly I felt off. I started calling for my mom but apparently it wasn’t very audible. I could feel myself falling forward like I was going to pass out. I felt like I was going to throw up. But being me, I managed to pop out my teeth aligners (Hello, Smile Direct Club) in case I was going to vomit. My vision blacked out from there. According to Kaleb, a swarm of nurses came in and helped me back into bed. My one memory of that moment is one of them putting smelling salts under my nose. I remember saying “no” cause YUCK but unclear if that was audible either.

It had been over 24 hours since I had eaten, paired with my hypoglycemia and having just given birth, it seemed like a recipe for disaster. My mom took care of me, turning my fan on and giving me coke to sip on to get my blood sugar back up. It took a little while but soon I was no longer sweating, I could see clearly, and all I wanted was to hold my baby again.

I didn’t eat deli meat while I was pregnant. I’m not a big deli meat girl but I was craving Firehouse so bad, of course. My sister made sure I had Firehouse waiting for me after Camden was born. I devoured that sandwich. A Hook n’ Ladder never tasted so good. A few hours after I ate and they were sure I wasn’t going to pass out, we were moved to the post delivery room.

But thanks to my little episode, I was marked as a “fall risk.” Which basically meant I was never going to have privacy ever again. I had to call a nurse every time I needed to go to the bathroom. The first nurse came in and laughed saying, “Oh yeah, I heard about you.” Apparently word travels fast on this L&D floor!

My first mom fail was Camden’s going home outfit. He had a couple bands on that needed to be cut off at the door of the hospital, one of which was a security monitor. So my footie pajamas were not going to work. Thankfully I had packed a onesie where they could access his ankles. Not a big deal but it made me laugh.

Saturday couldn’t have come soon enough. Our nurses were awesome but I was anxious to get home and started on our life as a family of 5. (Can’t forget Selfie & Hippie!) And of course, little sleep was happening in the hospital between all the check ins for me and Camden.